Interviewer’s note:

Cathy Baer is an extraordinary woman. She doesn’t give herself nearly enough credit for the life she’s lived. Writing this legacy letter was a challenge because she just wouldn’t acknowledge all of her accomplishments and the impact she’s had on others. That unwavering humility is what amazes me most about Cathy. It has been an honor to listen to her story and to share her incredible life with you.

Cathy Baer’s Legacy Letter

Hello, and thank you for taking the time to learn about my life. My name is Cathy, and I’ve had the privilege of living 84 years. I’ve worked hard, loved my family, and made some mistakes. Life hasn’t always been easy, but it’s been mine, and I’m proud of the journey I’ve walked.

My story doesn’t have any fame or fortune. Maybe a little resilience and joy in the small moments. I hope reading it might make you smile or maybe even remind you of your own story.

A Foundation of Resilience

I liked school. I went to Catholic school, so I had a good education. But I had to drop out in the eighth grade to take care of my younger brothers when my mother went to work because my stepfather was in the hospital with TB. That was hard for me, I hated it. I didn’t get enough time with my original father. He lived in California and was always overseas. When my stepfather got sick, my mother went to social services to get help, and they told her to go to work and take me out of school to watch the younger boys because my older brother needed an education more.

I wanted to be a flight attendant when I was young. I thought they looked cool. But sometimes life throws unexpected challenges. All you can do is respond to them the best you can. Even when things are difficult, keep learning and growing. I started working when I was young. I worked at a laundromat, a soda fountain, and a movie theater. I didn’t like the movie theater, so I quit. If you don’t like something, don’t be afraid to move on. Not everything is for everyone. I had many jobs when I was young, and that helped me to learn what I liked and what I didn’t. You can do anything you wanna do, just go out there and get it.

The Value of Education and Hard Work

I did go back to community college for work and got my GED. The only thing I couldn’t get was math, but a guy at the tunnel I worked at helped me. I got a 93 or something like that, a good score. Got a certificate with it. I was proud of that. I threw away all the certificates from my college classes, but that piece of paper stayed in a box. To prove I did it.

Education teaches you a lot but so does learning from your experiences and the people around you. I worked at the grocery store for 15 years. I liked it because I got to work in all the departments and learned about so many things. I worked as a cashier, in the front office, and on the night crew. I learned about how to do everything, from the dairy to the produce. I just enjoyed it. We had a good group of people there. Then, I went to work at the Fort McHenry tunnel. I was a supervisor there. I made sure the toll booth lights were on and that the people were doing their job. I’d move people around if one side was busier. I always made sure my workers got an extra five minutes for lunch. It meant the world to them. They were so grateful.

One of the girls I worked with at the tunnel, C., always thought of other people. She never complained about her job. She’s a real person. She says I was a good boss. I didn’t forget where I came from. Some people get up in the office, and they think they’re too good to be there. I was usually in a good mood. I like to treat people how I would want to be treated. I liked that job, especially at the beginning, when the customers were so friendly. Find work that you like, where you can learn and grow. There’s always some kind of work if you want it.

Volunteering and Giving Back

After I retired, I volunteered at the senior center to organize trips and cruises for everyone. I didn’t want to sit around, so I did something. It was all volunteer. I liked to be busy and helpful. At the tunnel we used to collect groceries to hand out to people for the Holidays. We had a vote for who would lead it. I voted for the other girl and that was the only vote she got. The rest were for me. I guess they must have wanted someone to do the dirty work.

Relationships and Family: The Ups and Downs

I got married when I was 17. He was 24. How did we meet? Well, he was a bus driver, and I was riding the bus, ha ha. We had two kids. One died last year, and the other one had a stroke. My ex-husband, he’s dead too. He had cancer. I have five grandchildren and seven

great-grandchildren. My ex-husband did not act like a married man. He was supposed to come home to his wife and kids at night, but he’d disappear. We were together off and on. Looking back, I was too young to get married. I wish I hadn’t. My mother was telling me not to get married, but I didn’t listen. So, listen to your mother and don’t get married to young.

Dealing with Health Challenges and Loss

I lost my best friend, J., to lung cancer. We worked together for 38 years. She was fun, and we were best friends. I miss her. I went to see her all the time before she died, but I stopped going out at night because I got scared, and I didn’t want to drive. I got a phone call from her on her last day and could tell that was going to be it.

Then, I lost my son last year. He had cancer. It’s okay, though. Everything happens for a reason. they say when one person dies another one’s born. He had another grandchild, right before that. And right after that, my granddaughter from the other brother had a baby, so that’s two of them come into the world. It took two to take his place. He was worth that much.

I had a stroke about five years ago. I can’t walk anymore, and I can’t use my right hand. I’ve been here ever since. They call it death row. I’m not afraid of it. I’m curious about what happens after death. I wonder what it would be like. When I die, my body will be donated to science. I hope they find something in there.

Travel and the Joy of Discovery

I loved to travel. I went on a cruise to the Bahamas and to New England. I went to New Orleans, California, Las Vegas, Tennessee, North Carolina, South Carolina, Virginia, and Pennsylvania. I loved New Orleans, but I wouldn’t want to live there. California was nice, but too expensive.

Tennessee was amazing, I could’ve stayed there forever. I just liked seeing new places, seeing new things. I like a change for a little bit. Embrace new experiences and see the world while you can. It will help you appreciate all the different people and places in the world.

Reflections and Advice for a Life Well-Lived

I like to learn. I learn a lot watching TV now. I guess I keep learning new things to replace the old ones. I don’t think I’m anyone special. I’m just a regular person. I do what needs to be done. There are a lot of things you have to do in life, but do them with a good attitude. I never wanted to be rich or famous, just a normal ordinary person.

So, here I am. A normal, ordinary person. I can’t walk, but I do what I can. I hope they remember me as a fair boss. I hope you found something in my story that resonates with you. Thank you for taking the time to learn about my life. My call to action is for you is to live your life to the end as fully as you can. I want to see people living. Don’t kill yourself. Go and enjoy what the world has to offer, if you can.

Treat others with kindness, learn from your experiences, and never stop seeking new adventures. Thank you for listening to my story. It means more than I can say.

With love, Cathy