There’s many things that can be said about Maria V. Perry. She loves chocolate pudding and played basketball when she was younger, but got thrown around because of her small size. Her birthstone is topaz and her favorite color is yellow. But if there’s one key thing to remember about her, it’s that she loves people.

This much was clear through how much she enjoyed our chats together. Specifically, she loves helping people, whether it be through laughter or food. The eldest daughter to six younger siblings, she grew up taking care of people and still enjoys it. She said it herself, “When you give you receive. And you don’t just give to receive. You give because you want to give. That’s been my life since I was a little girl.”

Maria has lived in Rhode Island for most of her life. A strong believer in working hard for what you want so you aren’t dependent on anyone else, she took on many jobs: jewelry maker, bartender, baker, chef, and waitress being the most notable. She started working when she was eight and has been working for most of her life.

Maria has been and continues to be the life of the party. She finds amusement in anything and tries to amuse everyone, even if it gets her into trouble. One day when her librarian came in to sub for her class, her wig fell off and Maria was thrown out of class because she couldn’t help but laugh. Maria also had a talking doll when she was younger and when she would ride the bus she would set it to laugh. Everyone on the bus would laugh at it while the bus driver told her to turn it off. Maria believes too many people go through life grouchy and hateful and has made it her ultimate goal to make people laugh.

Her birthday falls on November 25th, and with its proximity to Thanksgiving that always meant big, beautiful feasts. She’s turning 90 this year, and ever since she was a child she’d cook Thanksgiving dinner and only stopped just a couple years ago. She cooked turkey, ham, chicken, roast beef, and liver. Outside of Thanksgiving she loves to make cuisine from all different cultures: Portuguese, American, and Chinese being a few.

Social connection is of utmost importance to Maria. She has many siblings, nieces, and nephews, and loves to receive a phone call from them, even if it’s just to say hi. This kindness isn’t just reserved for friends and family. When she would walk with her mom as a child she would wave to strangers. When her mom asked her why she would respond, “just to say hello.”

There’s a lot to learn from Maria. Someone as empathetic, resilient, and joyful as her is not someone you talk to and soon forget. If we all lived like her there’d be a lot less conflict in this world. As she would put it, “It’s an easy life if you let it be.”

Throughout our talks Maria said many things that could be taken as meaningful advice, but the one I can’t stop thinking about is this:

“Just be true to yourself and true to everybody else. Don’t lie about nothing. Because lies will get you in a whole lot of mess.”

Interviewer’s Note

Upon first meeting Maria I could tell she had a warm, welcoming soul. She was immediately receptive to the idea of letting me write this letter and was always happy to talk. Even though she was the main focus in our visits, she would always ask if I was comfortable. She is such an affectionate person whose kindness knows no bounds and whose energy will lift anyone out of a bad mood.

Written by Continuum Hospice Volunteer Kareema McKenzie